a few months later

Looking around the living room, I know I should spend my time wisely, like catching up on all of the chores I’m behind on, but all I want to do is paint — to help clear my head. So I do.

As I’m brushing on the first coat, the fumes smack me in the face. For some reason, they seem to smell extra strong today. Over the years, I’ve tried just about every paint product on the market, trying to find ones that aren’t so pungent. So unsettling.  Somehow, each type of paint disappoints me in their own way. Latex paint. Chalk paint. Mineral paint. Acrylic too. None of them will do and as much as I love chalk paint, I’m almost certain it’s what’s been causing my migraines lately.

Mid-stroke, a thought comes to me.

What if I could create my own version of paint? Preferably one that didn’t smell like a neglected nail salon.

I dismiss the thought almost as soon as it comes.

Don’t be ridiculous.

Despite my doubts, a week later, I’m standing in my kitchen, like a caffeinated raccoon, surrounded by ingredients and gadgets. The counters are adorned with measuring cups, stir sticks, and pigments.

“Alexa, play Kelly Clarkson.”

As the music starts playing from the speakers, I begin to experiment. Measuring this, tweaking that. Hours later covered in ingredients, I feel oddly in my element. Which is pretty weird, mostly because I’ve never done this before in my life.

The first version I attempted, doesn’t come out quite right, but it’s a good start. I make three more versions that day, testing them side by side. None of them are quite right, but they’re oh so close. Close enough that it inspires me to keep going. Over the next few weeks, I keep trying and trying until one day, I finally get it right.

Delighted, the very first person I tell, is Molly.