Still sprawled out on the floor where the back gods left me, I start scrolling through the group. To my horror, as I continue to scroll for what feels like miles, I don’t encounter a single curse word. Not a single curse word. Not a glimmer of authenticity.

I’ll admit, I’m no expert, but I do have strong opinions when it comes to crafting and there should definitely be swear words in crafting. If you’re not saying fuck half way through your project, are you even doing it right?

Curiously disturbed, I click on their their group rules and begin reading. No cursing is at the top of the list.

Ew. What is this? Church?

As I continue reading though, the list if far more stuffier than I thought it would be.

Who knew socializing and crafts could be so strict?

Dick-deep in the comments on one of the posts, I notice a little virtual brawl happening in the comments. You know me, nosy as fuck, I swoop on in to read them. Among the bickering, another member rebelliously declares that they are starting their own group — where even sailor-mouthed women will be welcome. My eyebrow raises. 

Count me in.

Squinting at the screen, I read her name aloud.

Molly.

Ok Molly, now that’s more like it.

Curious, I click on her profile.

Who is this foul mouthed mother fucker?

As her profile picture fills my screen, I notice her pretty smile immediately. Her hair is long and dark and frames her pretty olive under-toned skin. Like the relentlessly nosy bitch that I am, I begin scrolling her page. I do happen to know that her page is absolutely none of my business, but that doesn’t stop me. By now, I’m dedicated to my creepy invasiveness. In the next photo, she’s smiling with her husband. The smile even reaches her eyes.

I guess she likes him.

Soaking in his combover and twinkly blue eyes, he gives off really wholesome vibes. Too wholesome.

It’s probably safe to assume that he and I certainly have very little in common. I do however get this feeling that Molly …is right up my alley. Having seen enough, I exit her page and return to the group, clicking on the group link she posted. When I do, the big blue JOIN GROUP button stares back at me.

A few minutes later, I’m in.

Shortly after being accepted into the group, I come to the conclusion that I was right about her being more my speed. With her feisty rants and colorful vocabulary, we quickly become friends.

Next thing I know, Molly and I are best friends and we tell each other absolutely everything.

When something sad or exciting happens, she’s the first I tell. We soon become so a part of each other's daily life, growing closer and closer. She starts to joke that perhaps we were sisters, separated at birth. Sometimes I wonder if she’s right. We seem to read each other so easily. Like an unspoken form of communication that only the two of us understand. There’s something incredibly beautiful about our connection. I try to put it into words to Jose, but I can’t. How do you explain that we’re platonic soulmates? It sounds so silly anytime I even think about the phrase, that I don’t even bother trying to explain it.

As for the group, she adds me as an admin. Not that I know how to admin a group. I don’t, but the group isn’t that big anyway. How hard can it be?

We affectionately name the group after ourselves, Crafty Bitches.

It isn’t long before our little group of crafty bitches becomes my favorite place on the internet. Within a few short weeks, the group blossoms into a virtual “living room” where we all routinely gather to laugh, vent, and cry. It’s our coffee house, our bar — a circle of womanhood. Crafty, sweary womanhood — our very own, wildly inappropriate community, right in our pockets.

Instead of going out on the weekends like the normies, we gather around our keyboards on Friday nights after our kids have gone to bed. With a glass of wine in hand, we laugh with each other until the wee hours of the morning.

Throughout the week, we play games, post ridiculous selfies, and share personal things about our everyday lives. Embarrassing, sad, funny. We share it all.

When the admin of the holier than thou group starts booting our members from his group, Molly creates a spinoff group, with a name close to his and asks me to admin it. 

For whatever reason, I said yes and as much turmoil as this choice would bring me in the future, it was the stepping stone to my wildest dreams...I just had to leap. Only...at the time...I had no idea what I was leaping towards. 

But that's an episode for another day. 

Until next time....